The Art of Self Pleasure

Category: Sex Education

Here is the choreography for a love dance you will enjoy on your own. I recommend reading this text carefully several times before you put it into practice. You may also keep these instructions close at hand while you practice.

I will offer suggestions for the core exercises only. If you would like to enhance any moment with your own ideas, feel free to do so. You might begin with a warm bath, then smooth your skin with your favorite body lotion or cream, or perhaps with virgin coconut oil. Be creative and keep discovering ways to enrich your sexual experience.

Begin by setting the scene with elements that engage all five senses. Please the eye with uncluttered surfaces, candles, or fresh flowers. Invite fragrance with incense or aromatherapy oils. Let music set the tone for sound. Refresh the palate with a fine wine, water, or ripe seasonal fruit. Use organic body oil or a sensual lubricant to heighten the sense of touch. Keep your chosen toys close at hand. Have towels ready for easy cleanup.

Your physical posture is essential for deep pleasure. Many people masturbate lying flat on the back with eyes closed, which can make it harder to remain fully present. Settle into a comfortable semi reclining position, as if you were propped up to read in bed. This position offers easy access to the vulva and vagina and makes it simpler to use your selected toys. It also supports emotional and sexual presence.

1. Begin with a brief meditation to cultivate calm, focused awareness.
2. After meditation, relax into a semi reclining position. Place one hand over your heart center, the heart chakra, and the other over your genitals. Begin practicing Ocean Breath to connect with your sensual awareness. Continue until you feel full and ready.
3. Continue Ocean Breath with a softly open mouth, letting gentle sounds flow. Caress and massage your body from head to toe to balance your energy. Follow your natural impulses until you are drawn to begin massaging the vulva. Be intuitive and observe how your body responds.
4. Begin the vulva massage following the diagram and guidance at the end of this article. Keep Ocean Breath steady throughout and take your time. Enjoy the massage with a spirit of innocence, grace, and curiosity.
5. Apply a non toxic organic lubricant and start by stimulating the clitoris with your fingers. It is important to establish tangible connection with your body at the start to build awareness of your sexual anatomy. As you notice the clitoris swell, slide a well lubricated ring finger gently into the vagina with your palm facing upward. Keep Ocean Breath flowing.
6. Feel for the slightly textured tissue on the front vaginal wall. This is your G spot. Notice its size and how it feels when touched. It may be less sensitive at first. As arousal builds, this area tends to swell and, for many women, becomes a primary source of pleasure.
7. Move your finger away from the G spot and stimulate the clitoris with your fingers or a vibrator until you near climax. While this is wonderful, it engages only certain areas. Let the clitoris serve as your on switch to warm the body. Once you are well aroused and natural lubrication is flowing, slow the pace so you can explore additional zones.
8. When you feel more than halfway to orgasm, introduce a honey dipper style wand on the G spot. Ensure ample lubrication for penetration. With the honey dipper on the G spot, add a vibrator or your fingers to stimulate the clitoris.

Your next step depends on which of the following reflects your experience:

• You feel pleasure with G spot stimulation
• You feel something other than pleasure, such as little to no sensation, irritation, or pain

If G spot stimulation feels pleasurable, simply continue. The key to multiple orgasms is to soften into pleasure rather than tense against it. Relaxing and opening the body with Ocean Breath allows sensation to build and the energy to rise, so orgasm becomes a full body experience rather than limited to the genitals. This is how high quality orgasms unfold. Keep releasing gentle sounds throughout, especially as you approach climax. Relax and ride the waves of pleasure.

If you notice little or no sensation at the G spot, continue to stimulate it together with the clitoris until you feel close to climax. Then pause clitoral stimulation and focus solely on the G spot. Remember that this area responds by swelling with consistent massage, so balance is essential. Keep massaging the G spot for a short while without touching the clitoris and simply notice what you feel. If numbness or discomfort remains, return to clitoral massage. Move between these approaches until the G spot becomes pleasurable or until you reach orgasm.

It is important to voice your sexual pleasure with sound. This supports the free flow of energy throughout the body.

A key to releasing sexual or emotional trauma is to offer yourself pleasure and allow that pleasure to unlock what has been stored in the cellular tissue. Then soften with Ocean Breath and let the body do what it is designed to do. Allow whatever arises to move through without withdrawing or shutting down. Emotions or sensations may surface, such as irritation, discomfort, pain, sadness, confusion, or simple unease. Whatever you feel is entirely normal and will shift. All of this is part of sexual healing and awakening.

The body is designed to heal itself. Our role is to offer the support it needs. In this practice, we support it through pleasure, breath, and relaxed awareness.

To awaken other zones of pleasure, begin exploring with different tools. The process remains the same. Keep in mind that when you work with the G spot and deeper areas of the vagina, it is important to remove clitoral stimulation from time to time so sensation can deepen within the vagina. Clitoral focus keeps awareness more on the surface.

When you begin to feel pleasure deep in the vagina, pause clitoral stimulation and savor the sensation as it moves through the body. Then reintroduce clitoral touch to amplify the experience.

We often rely too heavily on the clitoris. Once the vagina reconnects with its capacity for pleasure, the need for clitoral stimulation usually decreases. Think of the clitoris as a small engine that powers arousal. When vaginal pleasure reaches a certain intensity, the clitoris can serve to boost sensation rather than being the central focus.

At first, practice these exercises once a week or more if you can. Pleasure needs cultivation. If the practice starts to feel like a chore rather than a joy, ask yourself what would serve you better. Perhaps simple masturbation would feel more natural than a dedicated pleasure ritual. If so, give yourself that. There is real magic in those moments when we listen in and discover what we truly need.

Empowerment of the soul arises from inner freedom, the kind in which we know, understand, and take the actions we need in order to experience passion, pleasure, happiness, and unguarded self expression.

Diagrams

Begin with a vulva massage. Settle into a comfortable semi reclining position and relax. Make sure you have ample pillows behind your back for support. Start by connecting with your heart and your sexual center, then begin a short meditation

After meditation, lean back into the pillows and begin Ocean Breath. Keep one hand on your heart and the other on the vulva. Caress your body gently and sensually as you continue Ocean Breath.

Vulva massage

1. Begin by placing one hand over your heart and the other over the vulva while practicing Ocean Breath.
2. Grasp the tissue of the mons pubis and massage it firmly without using your fingertips (A).
3. Continue massaging the outer labia downward, working each side separately (B).
4. Massage the outer labia downward so your hands finish near the anus (C).
5. With your fingertips, massage the pelvic floor. Locate the edge of the bone that defines the pelvic opening and gently massage along the bone down to the base of the pelvis (D).
6. Cup the entire vulva with both hands and press, squeezing the labia together as firmly as feels comfortable (E).
7. Then grasp and massage the inner labia with your fingers from top to bottom (F).
8. Massage the shaft of the clitoris by holding it gently between thumb and index finger. With the shaft between your fingers, make small circular movements (G).
9. Finally, apply a generous amount of lubricant to the palms of both hands and stroke the entire vulva from base to tip, alternating hands as you go. Make sure your palm covers the full surface and keep the touch gentle.

When you feel ready, you can begin the pleasure practice as described above.

Experiment with different levels of pressure and varied movements. Explore and find what brings you the greatest pleasure. Notice how your body responds to sexual stimulation.